the Wakefield Doctrine (…because this is fun and because no one wrote in to ask us to stop…)
(ed. note the following installment of the CSR 101 series was written by Downspring AKH with the guidance and encouragement of Downspring#1. Go! Downsprings!)
(the Wakefield Doctrine (welcome back to CSR101 class…)
I want to introduce this Post. …Because…I’m the construct that has stepped out on her own, that’s why! That’s not true! they all know who I am, I am in block quotes and blue font, after all. As if! In my sleep, lol, sure I get it…’substitute’ Teacher… really? that’s too bad I hope he gets back soon. lol of course I can handle a scottian author…’Janie Sullivan to un-inspired blog creator’ unlimited character here!
The previous scottian writer?… offensant pour moi? lol! of course not, he was funny…what? oh all the time…Let’s let the editor guy get this done so we can all get back to the Planet Earth…nah I like her…well she is a scottian female…I would expect nothing less…no, not as old as those other people…oh yeah! I’m with Jimmy on that…smokin! shh shh here comes Principle Clark. Yeah…I don’t know! maybe the Readers (who ever they are) liked the last fake class room premise…well they are blog readers…you know what they say about blog readers…lol hadn’t heard that one. Hey- who is that with Principle Clark? Oh man another substitute Teacher premise…’Janie to creative writing department’…Code Blue guys Code Blue…lol
Principle Clark: Your regular Teacher is on a short sabbatical, (no, Britney that has nothing to do with his religion), so for today we have a substitute Teacher.
Class, this is Ms. AKH and she will be teaching your CSR 101 class for the remainder of the month or until we find a permanent substitute. I know you will all like her and give her all the respect and attention that you give your regular Teacher. (Miss Sullivan? Did you have something to say? I didn’t think so.) OK then… Ms. AKH?
Ms. AKH: Good morning! Everyone! How are you doing today? Am really excited to be here. You know, as I was walking into class, who is the first person I see but that weirdo Janie that Glenn Miller and Roger were telling me about in my class. That’s just fucking great. Hey! Just messin with ya! Really! We are all going to have fun and if we’re not careful you might even learn something. Hey relax! Lighten up, what are you all?… a bunch of old people? Here we go.
Good morning class and welcome to CSR 101. My name is Ms AKH.
Excuse me…What’s your name? Britney? Yes, you have pretty name. Thank you. I like my shoes too. Ok class, let’s get focused. This semester we’ll be covering the Wakefield Doctrine. Anyone familiar with the WD? Anyone?
Janie? I wasn’t sure if you heard me. Please put your headphones away.
You, in the back. What’s your name? Well Jimmy, let’s get this straight. First of all my personal life is none of your business and secondly it is very inappropriate to tell your teacher that she’s hot. What?? One more comment like that Jimmy and you’re out of here to see Principal Clark. Oh really. And what is your coach going to say to me? That you suck? That you can’t even get on the starters bench? So sit down and shut up. (shit this is going to be a long semester.)
Alright then, can we please get back to why we’re here? Our class will be based on the principles of the Wakefield Doctrine also referred to as the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers which is premised on the idea that we all have a different experience of the world and those around us. This perspective or perception is based on one of three personalities. These are the clarks, scotts and rogers which I will be going into further detail about.
Learning to identify the three will unfold over the next few weeks. To understand the Wakefield Doctrine is to understand these 3 distinct individual types. It is important to be aware that we all have the traits of all three, the potential to be a clark, scott or roger. However, one is predominant and this is the one that makes you a clark, scott or roger.
OK class! How do we spot a clark. Very funny, Miss Sullivan. They are by far the most difficult to understand/relate to. Often quiet loners, they tend to keep to themselves. However, don’t mistake their seemingly disinterested veneer as implying that they are unaware or even aloof. In actuality, the clarks command attention without saying a word.
Yes Jimmy? You want to be a clark because you think that clarks sound cool? Well, I can tell you right off the bat that you’re not cool and you’re not a clark. By standing up and proclaiming this you are telling the class which of the three you are…ok class anyone want to tell us what Jimmy here is? No Britney! While I may agree with you, that is not one of the three types we are talking about. (And if there were such a thing, I doubt it could fly, lol) Ok Jimmy sit down, you are a scott. Always seeking attention. But we’ll go into that later. So sit down and be quiet. Maybe you’ll learn something today (like that’s gonna happen).
OK back to the clarks. They are the creators. The intellectuals. Constantly striving for more knowledge. Now do you understand why you’re not a clark Jimmy?
In contrast, there are the rogers. They have a group mentality. Herds if you will. They are not attracted to “outsiders.” This goes against their grain. Rogers are content with themselves. It is the status quo that keeps them passive and therefore willing to accept being part of a “sameness.” Any who stray outside of the herd are viewed as being dangerous to the tranquility of the mundane. Keep in mind that these are not necessarily bad traits. They are the glue that holds society together. Without them, the world would become a very unstable place. Unlike clarks, rogers are not confrontational Whereas clarks welcome a seemingly “innocent” spar at any given time.
Britney, would you please wake up Janie? Her snoring is distracting the class. Thank you.
On to the scotts. These guys and gals are the epitome of ego. Unlike any of their counterparts, they seek and crave attention. They make themselves the center of attention, whether it be at a party or an office meeting. Their main purpose/objective is to make sure that they establish themselves as being superior in any given group. And they prey on rogers, viewing them as easy targets by which to inflate their insatiable ego.
Oh for Christ’s sake Jimmy, what is it now? You read that scottian women are extremely hot and sexy and that’s why you think I’m a scott? Give that man a prize! You finally got something right. Didn’t think you had it in you. OK class. I think that’s enough for one day. See you next week.
..done now? man I thought this would never end…no, I think she knows her Doctrine, but those scottian Teachers…inappropriate much? her not as bad as that old guy last week…what was his name…something to do with trumpet…no, Britney flutes are not made of…lmao…anyway where is Mr. B? he is the only one to get us out of this …Hey! aren’t those the Slovenian exchange students?..let’s go say hi…come on Britney…no I think Jimmy stayed after class to help Ms. AKH with something…lol I bet she would lol.